Archive for October, 2008

Notice to All Employees – New Company Policies

Wednesday, October 29th, 2008

As of November 5, 2008, when President Obama is officially elected into office, our company will instill a few new policies which are in keeping with his new, inspiring issues of change and fairness:

1.     All salespeople will be pooling their sales and bonuses into a common pool that will be divided equally between all of you.  This will serve to give those of you who are underachieving a “fair shake.”

2.     All low level workers will be pooling their wages, including overtime, into a common pool, dividing it equally amongst yourselves.  This will help those who are “too busy for overtime” to reap the rewards from those who have more spare time and can work extra hours.

3.     All top management will now be referred to as “the government.”  We will not participate in this “pooling” experience because the law doesn’t apply to us.

4.     The “company” will give eloquent speeches to all employees every week, encouraging its workers to continue to work hard “for the good of all.”

5.     The employees will be thrilled with these new policies because it’s “good to spread the wealth.”  Those of you who have underachieved will finally get an opportunity; those of you who have worked hard and had success will feel more “patriotic.”

6.     The last few people who were hired should clean out their desks.  Don’t feel bad, though, because President Obama will give you free health care, free handouts, free oil for heating your home, free food stamps, and he’ll let you stay in your home for as long as you want even if you can’t pay your mortgage.  If you appeal directly to our Democrat congress, you might even get a free flat screen TV and a coupon for free haircuts (shouldn’t all Americans be entitled to nice looking hair?) !!!

If for any reason you are not happy with the new policies, you may want to rethink your vote on November 4th.

The Heaviest Element

Tuesday, October 28th, 2008

The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.  A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years.  It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

In fact, Governmentium’s mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of morons promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration.  This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

The Sack Lunches

Tuesday, October 28th, 2008

I put my carry-on in the luggage  compartment and sat down in my assigned seat. It was going to be a  long flight. ‘I’m glad I have a good book to read.  Perhaps I will get a short nap,’ I  thought.

Just before take-off, a line of soldiers  came down the aisle and filled all the vacant seats, totally  surrounding me.  I decided to start a conversation.

‘Where are you headed?’ I asked the  soldier seated nearest to me. ‘ Chicago – to Great Lakes Base.  We’ll be there for two weeks for special training, and then we’re being deployed to Iraq.’

After flying for about an hour, an  announcement was made that sack lunches were available for five  dollars.  It would be several hours before we reached Chicago,  and I quickly decided a lunch would help pass the time.  As I reached for my wallet, I overheard soldier ask his buddy if he planned to buy lunch.

‘No, that seems like a lot of  money for just a sack lunch.  Probably wouldn’t be worth five  bucks.  I’ll wait till we get to Chicago.’  His friend agreed.

I looked around at the other soldiers.  None were buying lunch.  I walked to the back of the plane and handed the flight attendant a fifty dollar bill.  ‘Take a lunch to all those soldiers.’

She grabbed my arms and squeezed tightly.  Her eyes wet with tears, she thanked me.  ‘My son was a soldier in Iraq; it’s almost like you are doing it for him.’

Picking up ten sacks, she headed up the aisle to where the soldiers were seated.  She stopped at my seat and asked, ‘Which do you like best – beef or chicken?’

‘Chicken,’ I  replied, wondering why she asked.  She turned and went to the front of plane, returning a minute later with a dinner plate from first class.  ‘This is your thanks.’

After we finished eating, I went again to the back of the plane, heading for the rest room.  A man stopped me.  ‘I saw what you did. I want to be part of it.  Here, take this.’  He handed me twenty-five dollars.

Soon after I returned to my seat, I saw the Flight Captain coming down the aisle, looking at the aisle numbers as he walked.  I hoped he was not looking for me, but noticed he was looking at the numbers only on my side of the plane.  When he got to my row he stopped, smiled,  held out his hand, an said, ‘I want to shake your hand.’  Quickly unfastening my seat belt I stood and took the Captain’s hand.  With a booming voice he said, ‘I was a soldier and I was a military pilot.  Once, someone bought me a lunch.  It was an act of kindness I never forgot.’  I was embarrassed when applause was heard from all of the passengers.

Later I walked to the front of the plane so I could stretch my legs.  A man who was seated about six rows in front of me reached out his hand, wanting to shake mine.  He  left another twenty-five dollars in my palm.

When we landed in Chicago I gathered my belongings and started to deplane.  Waiting just inside the airplane door was a man who stopped me, put something in my shirt pocket, turned, and walked away without saying a word.  Another twenty-five dollars!

Upon entering the terminal, I saw the soldiers gathering for their trip to the base.  I walked over to them and handed them seventy-five dollars.  ‘It will take you some time to reach the base.  It will be about time for a sandwich.  God Bless You.’

Ten young men left that flight feeling the love and respect of their fellow travelers.  As I walked briskly to my car, I whispered a prayer for their safe return.  These soldiers were giving their all for our country.  I could only give them a couple of meals.  It seemed so little…

A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life wrote a blank check made payable to ‘The United States of America’ for an amount of ‘up to and including my life.’  That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.

Associated Press: Secret U.S. Mission Hauls Uranium from Iraq, July 5, 2008

Monday, October 27th, 2008

On July 5, 2008, the Associated Press (AP) released a story titled: Secret U.S. Mission hauls uranium from Iraq. The opening paragraph is as follows:    July 5, 2008  The last major remnant of Saddam Hussein’s nuclear program (a huge stockpile of concentrated natural uranium) reached a Canadian port Saturday to complete a secret U.S. Operation that included a two-week airlift from Baghdad and a ship voyage crossing two oceans.

See anything wrong with this picture?

We have been hearing from the far left for more than five years how Bush lied. Somehow, that slogan loses its credibility now that 550 metric tons of Saddam’s yellowcake, used for nuclear weapon enrichment, has been discovered and shipped to Canada for its new use as nuclear energy. It appears that American troops found the 550 metric tons of uranium in 2003 after invading Iraq. They had to sit on this information and the uranium itself for fear of terrorists attempting to steal it. It was guarded and kept safe by our military in a 23,000-acre site with large sand beams surrounding the site.

This is vindication for the Bush administration, having been attacked mercilessly by the liberal media and the far-left pundits on the blogo-sphere. Now that it is proven that President Bush did not lie about Saddam’s nuclear ambitions, one would think that the mainstream media would report the true story. Once the AP released the story, the mainstream media should have picked it up and broadcast it worldwide.

That never happened, due in large part, I believe, to the fact that the mainstream media would have to admit they were wrong about Bush’s war motives all along. Thankfully, the AP got it right when it said, ‘The removal of 550 metric tons of yellowcake, the seed material for higher-grade nuclear enrichment, was a significant step toward closing the books on Saddam’s nuclear legacy.’

Closing the book on Saddam’s nuclear legacy? Did Saddam have a nuclear legacy after all? I thought Bush lied? As it turns out, the people who lied were Joe Wilson and his wife.

Valerie Plame engaged in a clear case of nepotism and convinced the CIA to send her husband on a fact finding mission in February 2002, seeking to determine if Saddam Hussein attempted to buy yellowcake from Niger. The CIA and British intelligence believed Saddam contacted Niger for that purpose but needed proof.

During his trip to Niger, Wilson actually interviewed the former prime minister of Niger, Ibrahim Assane Mayaki. Mayaki told Wilson that in June of 1999, an Iraqi delegation expressed interest in ‘expanding commercial relations’ for the purposes of purchasing yellowcake.

Wilson chose to overlook Mahaki’s remarks and reported to the CIA that there was no evidence of Hussein wanting to purchase yellow cake from Niger.

However, with British intelligence insisting the claim was true, President Bush used that same claim in his State of the Union address in January of 2003. Outraged by Bush’s insistence that the claim was true, Wilson wrote an op-Ed in the New York Times in the summer of 2003 slamming Bush.

Wilson did this in spite of the fact that Mayaki said Saddam did try to buy the yellowcake from Niger. The Senate Select Committee on Intelligence disagreed with Wilson and supported Mayaki’s claim. This meant nothing to Wilson who was opposed to the Iraq war and thus had ulterior motives in covering up the prime minister’s statements.

It was a simple tactic, really. If the far-left and their friends in the media could prove Bush lied about Hussein wanting to purchase yellowcake from Niger, it would undermine President Bush’s credibility and give them more cause for asking what other lies he may have told.

Yet the real lie came from Wilson, who interpreted his own meaning from the prime minister’s statements and concluded all by himself that the claim of Saddam attempting to purchase yellowcake was ‘unequivocally wrong.’ Curiously the CIA sat on this information and did not inform the CIA Director, who sided with Bush on the yellowcake claim. This was made public in a bipartisan Senate Intelligence Committee report in July 2004.

Valerie Plame also engaged in her own lie campaign by spreading the notion that the Bush Administration outed her as a CIA agent. Never mind that it was Richard Armitage – no friend of the Bush administration – who leaked Plame’s identity to the press. Never mind that Plame had not been in the field as a CIA agent in some six years.

The truth is, due to their opposition to the war, Joe Wilson, Valerie Plame, the mainstream media, and their left-wing friends on the blogo-sphere engaged in a propaganda campaign to undermine the Bush administration. Now that Saddam’s uranium has been made public and is no longer a threat to the world, do you think these aforementioned parties will apologize and admit they were wrong?

Don’t count on it.

The rest of the American people should hear the truth about Saddam’s uranium. It is up to you and me to inform them.

As far as the anti-war crowd is concerned, the next time they say that Bush lied, we should tell them to ‘have the yellowcake and eat it too.’

For verification of this information, click on these links:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/25546334/

http://www.truthorfiction.com/rumors/u/uraniumyellowcake.htm

President Bush FINALLY vindicated on presence of WMD in Iraq!

Monday, October 27th, 2008

A national defense analyst says President Bush should be commended for keeping quiet about a discovery that could have blown his critics out of the water.

Retired Major General Jerry Curry is a decorated combat veteran who served as an Army aviator, paratrooper, and Ranger during a military career that began during the Korean conflict. He recently wrote about a very under reported story by the Associated Press.

According to the report, a large stockpile of concentrated natural Uranium, known as ‘yellowcake,’ reached a Canadian port to complete a top secret U.S. Operation that included a two-week airlift from Baghdad, and a s hip voyage crossing two oceans. The Uranium material had been housed at a former Iraqi nuclear complex 12 miles from Baghdad.

Curry says the president kept mum about the discovery in order to keep terrorists in the dark. ‘He made a very brave stand, a resolute stand…, in which he decided that he wasn’t going to blab everything to the press,’ Curry commends. ‘…And in the meantime while he kept it quiet, he was buying time from the terrorists to get all that stuff out of the country. So that’s what was done — he just very quietly kept his mouth shut.’

‘The press beat him to death for the last several years,’ he continues, ‘and now it turns out that, yes, there were weapons of mass destruction….’ Curry also maintains that Saddam Hussein had an active nuclear program and the material could have been made into a nuclear weapon.

President Bush’s actions took courage, he notes, and all Americans should be thankful to have such a brave president who puts the welf are of the American people above personal considerations.

Patience and Wisdom – a great visual example

Monday, October 27th, 2008

patience-and-wisdom.jpg

In his own words – quotes from Obama’s books

Saturday, October 25th, 2008

These speak for themselves. 

From Dreams of My Father: ‘I ceased to advertise my mother’s race at the age of 12 or 13, when I began to suspect that by doing so I was ingratiating myself to whites.’

From Dreams of My Father : ‘I found a solace in nursing a pervasive sense of grievance and animosity against my mother’s race.’

From Dreams of My Father: ‘There was something about him that made me wary, a little too sure of himself, maybe. And white.’

From Dreams of My Father: ‘It remained necessary to prove which side you were on, to show your loyalty to the black masses, to strike out and name names.’

From Dreams of My Father: ‘I never emulate white men and brown men whose fates didn’t speak to my own. It was into my father’s image, the black man, son of Africa , that I’d packed all the attributes I sought in myself , the attributes of Martin and Malcolm, DuBois and Mandela.’

 
And FINALLY the Most Damning one of ALL of them – From Audacity of Hope:
‘I will stand with the Muslims should the political winds shift in an ugly direction.’

————–

God help us.

How the Bailout Works

Friday, October 24th, 2008

Young Chuck moved to Texas and bought a Donkey from a farmer for $100. The farmer agreed to deliver the Donkey the next day.   The next day he drove up and said, ‘Sorry son, but I have some bad News, the donkey died.’   

Chuck replied, ‘Well, then just give me my money back.’    

The farmer said, ‘Can’t do that. I went and spent it already.’    

Chuck said, ‘Ok, then, just bring me the dead donkey.’    

The farmer asked, ‘What ya gonna do with him?

Chuck said, ‘I’m going to raffle him off.’   

The farmer said you can’t raffle off a dead donkey!’    

Chuck said, ‘Sure I can. Watch me. I just won’t tell anybody he’s dead.’    

A month later, the farmer met up with Chuck and asked, ‘What happened with that dead donkey?’     

Chuck said, ‘I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two dollars a piece and made a profit of $998.’    

The farmer said, ‘Didn’t anyone complain?’    

Chuck said, ‘Just the guy who won. So I gave him his two dollars back.’     

Chuck now works for Goldman Sachs. 

My Redistribution Experiment

Friday, October 24th, 2008

In a local restaurant my server had on a “Obama 08″ tie. I was pleased, as he had given away his political preference–just imagine the coincidence to come.

When the bill came I decided not to tip the server and explained to him that I was exploring the Obama ‘redistribution of wealth’ concept.  He stood there in disbelief while I told him that I was going to redistribute his tip to someone who I deemed more in need–the homeless guy outside. The server angrily stormed from my sight.

I went outside, gave the homeless guy $10 and told him to thank the server inside as I had decided he could use the money more.  The homeless guy was grateful.

At the end of my rather unscientific redistribution experiment I realized the homeless guy was grateful for the money he did not earn, but the waiter was pretty angry that I gave away the money he did earn even though the actual recipient needed the money more.

I guess redistribution of wealth is an easier thing to swallow in concept than in practical application.

Rhinoceros Times, October 20, 2008 “Would the Last Honest Reporter Please Turn On the Lights?” written by Orson Scott Card

Thursday, October 23rd, 2008

An open letter to the local daily paper — almost every local daily paper in America:

I remember reading All the President’s Men and thinking: That’s journalism. You do what it takes to get the truth and you lay it before the public, because the public has a right to know.

This housing crisis didn’t come out of nowhere. It was not a vague emanation of the evil Bush administration.

It was a direct result of the political decision, back in the late 1990s, to loosen the rules of lending so that home loans would be more accessible to poor people. Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac were authorized to approve risky loans.

What is a risky loan? It’s a loan that the recipient is likely not to be able to repay.

The goal of this rule change was to help the poor — which especially would help members of minority groups. But how does it help these people to give them a loan that they can’t repay? They get into a house, yes, but when they can’t make the payments, they lose the house — along with their credit rating.

They end up worse off than before.

This was completely foreseeable and in fact many people did foresee it. One political party, in Congress and in the executive branch, tried repeatedly to tighten up the rules. The other party blocked every such attempt and tried to loosen them.

Furthermore, Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae were making political contributions to the very members of Congress who were allowing them to make irresponsible loans. (Though why quasi-federal agencies were allowed to do so baffles me. It’s as if the Pentagon were allowed to contribute to the political campaigns of congressmen who support increasing their budget.)

Isn’t there a story here? Doesn’t journalism require that you who produce our daily paper tell the truth about who brought us to a position where the only way to keep confidence in our economy was a $700 billion bailout? Aren’t you supposed to follow the money and see which politicians were benefiting personally from the deregulation of mortgage lending?

I have no doubt that if these facts had pointed to the Republican Party or to John McCain as the guilty parties, you would be treating it as a vast scandal. “Housing-gate,” no doubt. Or “Fannie-gate.”

Instead, it was Sen. Christopher Dodd and Congressman Barney Frank, both Democrats, who denied that there were any problems, who refused Bush administration requests to set up a regulatory agency to watch over Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, and who were still pushing for these agencies to go even further in promoting subprime mortgage loans almost up to the minute they failed.

As Thomas Sowell points out in a TownHall.com essay entitled “Do Facts Matter?” (http://snipurl.com/457to): “Alan Greenspan warned them four years ago. So did the Chairman of the Council of Economic Advisers to the President. So did Bush’s Secretary of the Treasury.”

These are facts. This financial crisis was completely preventable. The party that blocked any attempt to prevent it was … the Democratic Party. The party that tried to prevent it was … the Republican Party.

Yet when Nancy Pelosi accused the Bush administration and Republican deregulation of causing the crisis, you in the press did not hold her to account for her lie. Instead, you criticized Republicans who took offense at this lie and refused to vote for the bailout!

What? It’s not the liar, but the victims of the lie who are to blame?

Now let’s follow the money … right to the presidential candidate who is the number two recipient of campaign contributions from Fannie Mae.

And after Fred Raines, the CEO of Fannie Mae who made $90 million while running it into the ground, was fired for his incompetence, one presidential candidate’s campaign actually consulted him for advice on housing.

If that presidential candidate had been John McCain, you would have called it a major scandal and we would be getting stories in your paper every day about how incompetent and corrupt he was.

But instead, that candidate was Barack Obama, and so you have buried this story, and when the McCain campaign dared to call Raines an “adviser” to the Obama campaign — because that campaign had sought his advice — you actually let Obama’s people get away with accusing McCain of lying, merely because Raines wasn’t listed as an official adviser to the Obama campaign.

You would never tolerate such weasely nit-picking from a Republican.

If you who produce our local daily paper actually had any principles, you would be pounding this story, because the prosperity of all Americans was put at risk by the foolish, short-sighted, politically selfish and possibly corrupt actions of leading Democrats, including Obama.

If you who produce our local daily paper had any personal honor, you would find it unbearable to let the American people believe that somehow Republicans were to blame for this crisis.

There are precedents. Even though President Bush and his administration never said that Iraq sponsored or was linked to 9/11, you could not stand the fact that Americans had that misapprehension — so you pounded us with the fact that there was no such link. (Along the way, you created the false impression that Bush had lied to them and said that there was a connection.)

If you had any principles, then surely right now, when the American people are set to blame President Bush and John McCain for a crisis they tried to prevent, and are actually shifting to approve of Barack Obama because of a crisis he helped cause, you would be laboring at least as hard to correct that false impression.

Your job, as journalists, is to tell the truth. That’s what you claim you do, when you accept people’s money to buy or subscribe to your paper.

But right now, you are consenting to or actively promoting a big fat lie — that the housing crisis should somehow be blamed on Bush, McCain and the Republicans. You have trained the American people to blame everything bad — even bad weather — on Bush, and they are responding as you have taught them to.

If you had any personal honor, each reporter and editor would be insisting on telling the truth — even if it hurts the election chances of your favorite candidate.

Because that’s what honorable people do. Honest people tell the truth even when they don’t like the probable consequences. That’s what honesty means. That’s how trust is earned.

Barack Obama is just another politician, and not a very wise one. He has revealed his ignorance and naivete time after time — and you have swept it under the rug, treated it as nothing.

Meanwhile, you have participated in the borking of Sarah Palin, reporting savage attacks on her for the pregnancy of her unmarried daughter — while you ignored the story of John Edwards’ own adultery for many months.

So I ask you now: Do you have any standards at all? Do you even know what honesty means?

Is getting people to vote for Barack Obama so important that you will throw away everything that journalism is supposed to stand for?

You might want to remember the way the National Organization of Women (NOW) threw away their integrity by supporting Bill Clinton despite his well-known pattern of sexual exploitation of powerless women. Who listens to NOW anymore? We know they stand for nothing; they have no principles.

That’s where you are right now.

It’s not too late. You know that if the situation were reversed, and the truth would damage McCain and help Obama, you would be moving heaven and earth to get the true story out there.

If you want to redeem your honor, you will swallow hard and make a list of all the stories you would print if it were McCain who had been getting money from Fannie Mae, McCain whose campaign had consulted with its discredited former CEO, McCain who had voted against tightening its lending practices.

Then you will print them, even though every one of those true stories will point the finger of blame at the reckless Democratic Party, which put our nation’s prosperity at risk so they could feel good about helping the poor, and lay a fair share of the blame at Obama’s door.

You will also tell the truth about John McCain: that he tried, as a senator, to do what it took to prevent this crisis. You will tell the truth about President Bush: that his administration tried more than once to get Congress to regulate lending in a responsible way.

This was a Congress-caused crisis, beginning during the Clinton administration, with Democrats leading the way into the crisis and blocking every effort to get out of it in a timely fashion.

If you at our local daily newspaper continue to let Americans believe — and vote as if — President Bush and the Republicans caused the crisis, then you are joining in that lie.

If you do not tell the truth about the Democrats — including Barack Obama — and do so with the same energy you would use if the miscreants were Republicans — then you are not journalists by any standard.

You’re just the public relations machine of the Democratic Party, and it’s time you were all fired and real journalists brought in, so that we can actually have a daily newspaper in our city.